Quotes

Awe shucks, guess what arrived on my doorstep via a brown clothed giver of magical boxes fairy? Nothin’ but the third installment from the demented minds at ZT! I got me a BUSHLICKER – and y’all can suck it!!!

One could go on and on about the EDC design of this runt, or how it begs like dog at the thanksgiving table to be held, or how die besten deutschen stahl holds an edge, or the fine craftsmanship of the leather holster this runt sleeps in, or the perfect balance point, but naw, that’s too easy.
I’m gonna tell ya that if you weren’t one of the lucky few that got this quenched in virgin blood, forged by the bones of Vikings, honed on slabs of bacon, cursed at by god herself, little bastard of a tool – then you’re not worthy…not even remotely (why are you still reading this? I hear the Swiss make something that will trim your little boy nails.)
Meantime, the bushlicker and I have some man work to do on the ranch.

- T-Wrecks, Fort Collins, CO

I got my Deuce today and I’m completely blown away. The Deuce is the ideal size and weight that just feels excellent in in my hands. I ordered the Reaver Cleaver before this and that is an excellent piece. But this Deuce! I love the design the long handle provides amazing leverage combined with this massive blade the damage potential here is just ridiculous. The pointed tip is just nastiness. It’s a personal goal of mine to put as many zombie tools in the hands of the american public as i can before the zombies come. You guys are the shit.

- J. M., Cambridge, MA

Your blades are better than the web and vids show. Really satisfied so far. Our Kung Fu school like most practice several varieties of weapons. I specialize in the knife, sabre, staff, and Qua Dao (shorter heavier Naginata).

I am also a collector, my collection of hundreds of blades, range in styles and quality all focused on functionality. The ZT blades are in a category of their own. By far the most well rounded design, and are now my favorites of all my collection.

Thank you for both excellent customer service and quality. I will share my discovery with everyone.

- J.A., Rancho Cordoba, CA

Two weeks ago I left on a road trip that took me halfway across the continent and back again, a journey to Wasteland Weekend (which y’all should check out). One my way out there I must have sucked some bad gas and I had to replace my fuel filter in my rather low slung car. I pulled off into the midnight desert and used my Vakra to dig a ditch so I could get under my car. Off and on my way! Thirty miles from anywhere in the mountains, a tire blew. My shitty scissor jack kept sinking and sliding in the sand. My Rand McNally didn’t help it, so with a heavy heart I laid down my trusty Tibetan toe clipper and started jacking, sure it would destroy it. I changed the tire and let the car down. The only damage to my Vakra was a minor scratch in the finish, still straight as an arrow. Thank you, Zombie Tools, for making something that saved my butt not once, but twice at 2 am on a deserted, desert mountain road outside of Barstow, California.

- K.M., Georgetown, TX

I just wanted to drop you all a line and say how impressed I am with the quality of my recent purchase [The Diphos]. Beautiful blade, excellent balance, and with better lines than a collegiate geometry course. I couldn’t be any more in love if it was capable of oral. Thanks guys. Keep it up. I’ll be back for more.

- A.G., Monroe, LA

So I had this dream last night.

Scientists discovered that doughnuts are naturally occurring phenomena. Under the right circumstances, doughnuts will exist in any environment. The size, shape, & flavor of the doughnut is determined by its element’s position on the periodic table. For example: the standard ringed cake doughnut is a result of the element beryllium, and molybdenum will produce various barred doughnuts.

The glaze of a doughnut is determined by an element’s isotopic value and can be calculated and predicted. By simply adding or removing neutrons from the nucleus of an atom, we can manipulate the outward flavor of our doughnut.

A terrifying consequence of this discovery was the unintentional creation of a dangerously unstable bacon-maple bar. The likes of which contains the destructive force of every bomb ever constructed…combined.

Though the research was kept secret, several warring nations have begun experimenting with weaponized crullers, dirty jelly-fills, & worse… pastries of ultimate mass destruction.

- Rob, Zombie Tools

I just received my Diphos at my workplace. Normally, this would probably get someone escorted out by armed guard or police, but everybody here, manager to engineer, sword lover or not, had nothing but praise for the product look and quality.

The sheath got compliments too, and it feels like it’s a whole product (sword and sheath) – not just an afterthought. The blade (lemme wipe the drool off my lip) is absolutely gorgeous, balanced, and the heft… Sweet Maker…

You and the entire team should be proud of what you do and the love you put into the final pieces. The blade I received feels like a one-off, not just something I bought off the net.

Keep doing what you’re doing.

- R.E., Elk Grove Village, IL

You guys rule. I got my katana on Wednesday and it exceeded my expectations by a lot. The thing that I absolutely love about it is that I know it can actually cut some serious stuff in half with it. I have always wanted a true cutting katana but didn’t want to drop 3-12k on a showpiece I would never actually cut something with. I can assure you, the ZT sword will get some use.

- K.R., Denver, CO

Just received the Deuce in the mail today and just wanted to say that it surpassed all expectation. I’m at a bit of a loss as to what to say; other than great job, amazing design work, nice balance, combined in a wicked meaty blade… I was surprised at the size and heft of it, as it really doesn’t translate in the pictures. Way beyond expectations, I will shout your name to anyone who mentions the word ‘apocalypse’ to me – Hahaha!!! You guys really don’t fuck around. Love it!

- A.V., Toronto, Canada

Traumahawk. TOTALLY AWESOME. First thing I did was cut myself with the beard. I love it. I need another one. As always nothing but the best from you guys!

- L.S. Pelion, SC

I don’t hate unicorns.
I just love killing them.

- Joey, Zombie Tools

Want to buy a sword? Well, you can give us money now or your sister later.

- Chris, Zombie Tools

The blade made it to my friend’s house a day or so ago, and I couldn’t be more pleased with the piece. The sword has ideal heft and weight balance; you can really distinguish the work put into the whole thing. This is really a work of art, and the fact that it may someday neatly cleave some undead assholes apart only makes it that much more so. You guys have really impressed me, and I just wanted to say it was worth every penny and thank all of you for the blade.

- T.C., Jackson, MS

Thanks to all at Zombie Tools. My blade arrived much earlier than anticipated and I now possess the most versatile tool in my anti-Zack arsenal. From the smell of motor oil and leather to the combination of art, history and science, everyone at ZT should be proud to offer such products as yours.

- P.H., Springfield, IL

Got my Apokatana yesterday! So very cool!!! Great craftsmanship! Really solid and beautiful. Please give my thanks to your team for building such a great katana!

- D.S., Austin, TX

I just wanted to drop you a line to say i was one very naughty boy this year, yet thanks to Santa and a truly badass girlfriend, I awoke Christmas morn to find a ZT Bone Machete in my stocking. To say I was elated would be an understatement. I had been drooling over images of it on your site for months. I also wanted to thank you for the time and craftsmanship that goes into your blades. They are truly works of art. The photos and videos do not do them justice. They are superb.

Keep up the good work. You fine gentlemen are the embodiment of all things that once made this country great; artistry, devotion, and pride to name a few. It restores my faith in the people of this nation to know there are men like yourselves out there fighting the good fight.

When the Zed shit hits the fan…save one for me. I got a Bone Machete with that geek’s name on it.

- M.H., Nashville, TN

Oh happy day. UPS just left and I have my Zakasushi. With the plastic on and such a nice finish it almost doesn’t seem real. The pattern on the steel is like camouflage and I’m sure it will eliminate all telltale glare. Much better than any plain blade. The weight and balance almost makes it float. But believe me I KNOW it is real. So sturdy. So professional. So cool. So mine. Tomorrow the plastic comes off and a water bottle will die horribly.

- M.F., Georgetown, IN

Just got in from Utah and found the Felon! What a crazy, wicked, incredibly sharp, outstanding tool. The fit and finish is everything I could have expected and then some. You guys do an excellent job, the handle shape is perfect. Your kydex molding is superior as well.

You can damn sure expect more orders from me!

Thank you all for your stellar efforts! I’m gonna crack the seal on a jug of Four Roses single barrel, Cheers!!

- M.H., Rawilns, WY

Sirs, I have recently received my second order from your company. I am 100% completely satisfied in your edged weapons. I can find no comparison or competition that come close to your quality, craftsmanship and detail. The lines are beautiful, function is phenomenal and your blades are worthy of any collector. I will be adding more of your blades to mine in the very near future. Please allow me to add — never sacrifice quality in exchange for fast production. Your blades are well worth the wait.

- B.S., Sherrill, NY

I just received my ZT Bone Machete, and I just wanted to feedback my appreciation for the quality and attention to detail that you put into my steel. I’m sure that you’re no stranger to glowing reviews, so chock up another one. It has exceeded all of my expectations, and I can’t wait to get out in the woods with it. Your tools are proof positive that you can have high quality and great looks all in one package. I’m finding myself lucky that it cost only what it did. 😉

- J.C., Oakdale, PA

This here pistol’s got 6 bullets. There’s 5 of you.

Someone’s getting shot twice.

- Maxon, Zombie Tools

My Reaper arrived today and I gotta say…you guys are THE SHIT!!! This is a badass piece. It was well worth the wait. You can definitely look for me to buy more steel in the very near future. Keep up the great work and  thanks again.

- C.P., Hawaiian Gardens, CA

I’ve just received the blades today and oh boy am I impressed! I own various other hand made western and oriental swords and I was absolutely amazed by the workmanship you guys have put into these blades! The symmetrical grinds and the perfect fit of the fittings were very impressive! It is definitely worth the 3 month wait! I can’t wait to order my next set of ZT steel.

Cheers from Down Under!

- B.O., Craigieburn, Australia
1909 Wyoming #8-9
Missoula, Montana 59801